


in your eyes

by whoaaitsmichele



Category: 9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020)
Genre: Drug Addiction, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-02
Updated: 2020-02-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 07:35:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,437
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22520107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whoaaitsmichele/pseuds/whoaaitsmichele
Summary: tk hears from his mom and doesn’t have a good reaction.
Relationships: Carlos Reyes (9-1-1 Lone Star)/TK Strand
Comments: 16
Kudos: 388





	1. Chapter 1

Owen Strand was exhausted. After the tornado that swept through Austin last week, there was seemingly an emergency every day, multiple times a day that the firehouse had to help with. The city was still rebuilding itself and while their house wasn’t hit like half the city was, they did all they could to help. He spent the previous day getting treatment for his illness, telling his son that he needed to go out of town for a few hours. The look Judd gave him from the other side of the room was a mix of concern and judgement. 

Even though he confessed to Judd about his cancer, he felt a horrible pit in his stomach that if it didn’t tell TK soon, his son would do something to harm himself. He didn’t want to be the reason for his son possibly relapsing again. 

Noting that it was 11 p.m. now, and he knew TK was off shift, he figured he would be home to break the news to him.

He walked in through the front door and heard someone crying from the back of the house. He walked quickly, noting that the kitchen light was on and saw his son sitting at the table, staring at something in front of him with tears pouring down his cheeks.

Owen walked closer and took notice of what was keeping TK’s attention.

_Pills._

“TK?” He asked, softly and his son jumped in his chair and looked between the pills and his dad. He let out a heart wrenching sob that had Owen kneeling down next to his son. TK fell into his arms and cried.

He was always safe in his dad’s arms. 

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I couldn’t help it. I’m sorry. I didn’t take any, please don’t be mad” he mumbled, and he felt his dad rub his back in a soothing motion. 

“It’s okay. You’re okay,” he responded and he flashed back to when TK was laying on the floor unresponsive in his New York apartment. He felt as helpless as he did back then, but at least TK was alright now. Physically anyway. Mentally was another story.

“It was mom,” TK stated and he felt his dad’s arms go stiff around them.

“What?” Owen asked, afraid of the response he would get. Nothing good came from his relationship with Angela, except TK of course. 

She ruined their family when she left them when TK was 13. Shortly after TK’s bar mitzvah, their son came out to them.

Owen always knew and loved his son. He would always accept him and protect him from the cruel people in the world that wouldn’t.

Angela was another story. She couldn’t find it in herself to accept her son for who he was and a week after ignoring his presence in the house, after Owen tried to talk with her about the fact that TK was no different than he was before, she left in the middle of the night. Owen never forgave her for leaving their son heartbroken without a mother to love him. His second wife Carol was great and accepted TK, but she couldn’t deal with the danger of them both being firefighters and they parted on amicable terms.

Owen was broken out of his thoughts by feeling TK’s weight getting heavier against him.

“Hey kid, let’s get you to bed,” he gently shook his son awake.

“‘W’nna sleep,” TK all but mumbled, his eyes barely opened as Owen helped his son up out of his chair. TK leaned heavily against his dad as he was helped to his room and he fell into the bed and fell asleep almost instantly. Clearly tired out from crying, he didn’t even manage to fully get his entire body onto the bed. 

Owen let out a laugh as he lifted TK’s legs onto the bed and shifted his son so he was sleeping on a pillow, before he took his son’s shoes off and put a blanket over him.

Looking at TK, he was brought back to the night when his son realized his mother wasn’t coming back. He had cried himself to sleep that night as well and Owen swore he was going to do anything in his power to make sure his son wouldn’t be left heartbroken again.

Sadly, he wasn’t there earlier in the night to control his ex-wife’s actions, just like he couldn’t all those years ago. His son was his priority and it would always be that way. 

Glancing one more time at TK to see that he was sleeping soundly, he quietly left the room and walked back to the kitchen. 

He took notice of the pills on the table and quickly grabbed them, crushed them and then washed them down the sink. He needed to get TK help. He needed to talk to his son’s therapist. He needed to talk to his crew. Maybe even that cop that Michelle was friends with that seemed to like TK. He needed to get as many people in TK’s corner as he could.

He needed to prove to his son that they wouldn’t leave him. The idea of TK struggling with this addiction killed him. The idea of his own mother being the reason made him feel even worse. 

Something in the corner of his eye caught his attention and he saw TK’s phone on the floor underneath the table. He leaned down to pick it up and saw texts from an unfamiliar number and felt his heart drop out of his chest.

_“TK, it’s mom. Come home.”_

_“TK, there’s a place where they can help you.”_

_“You will be able to get rid of your unnatural urges there.”_

Owen saw red as he looked through the texts, with over a dozen more he left unread because he knew what she was spewing to their son was filth.

Did she really think she would convince their 25 year old son to go to conversion therapy?

The idea made him seeth and he took a breath to calm down, trying to fight the urge to just throw the cell phone at the wall. If he did that, TK would surely wake up and his son needed rest. While his son was an adult, he was fragile. He hated using that word to describe his son, because TK was one of the strongest people he knew, but the addiction was strong and between the break up with Alex, his overdose and now this whole new issue with his mother, he didn’t know how much longer it would take for TK to break. 

Tomorrow would be a new day where his son could finally heal.

Or so he hoped.

\--

“TK, what are you doing?” Judd asked, walking into the locker room a week later to put his jacket away. The younger man was sitting on a bench, gripping something in his hand, before he shook his head at the older firefighter.

“Nothing, I’m fine,” he responded. Judd looked at TK with suspicion before walking out of the locker room and TK let out a sigh of relief before throwing the pills in his mouth.

He wanted the pain to end. He wasn’t a good person. His mom left him because he wasn’t the son she wanted and Alex left him because he didn’t love him. Who could love him? A gay drug addict who depended on trying to be a hero to show his worth. He wasn’t worth anything. 

Banging his hand hard against his locker, he went to stand up and felt the world spin.

Oh.

The drugs were taking effect.

Perfect.

“TK?”

“TK!”

Everything was fading in and out for the young firefighter. He thought he could hear Judd yelling his name and was that Michelle? 

“I need the narcan!” Her voice was getting further and further away from him and he felt himself slowly lose consciousness.

He felt something come over his face. Was it a mask? He couldn’t tell. All he saw was a blur. 

He felt himself suddenly jolted awake from the narcan and he turned over to throw up the pills.

“Easy kid,” Judd said softly, before lifting TK up from under his legs and arms.

“No no no nonono,” TK struggled in the other man’s arms, “I w’nna die.” His struggle seized as he lost consciousness again and Judd and Michelle looked down at the young man with worry.

“Let’s go,” Michelle stated firmly, leading Judd to the ambulance with TK in his arms. Placing him on the gurney and as Michelle went about helping TK, Judd cursed to himself. He should have realized something was wrong with the younger man with his suspicious behavior in the locker room. 

Owen had told them what happened with TK the other week and he had wanted to throw something after. How could a mother treat her son like that? 

The kid had an annoying streak, but he always meant well and he struggled so much that Judd just wanted to put him in a bubble so he wouldn’t get hurt again. Grace had laughed at him when he suggested it one night at the bar, when TK had gotten smoke inhalation after a house fire a month prior.

_“You’re worried about him,” Grace said, smirking as Judd rolled his eyes._

_“The kid seems to think he’s invincible,” he stated, taking a sip of his beer._

_She let out a laugh, “I seem to recall hearing about a certain reckless probie who thought he could save a kitten from a tree WITHOUT proper equipment.”_

_“It was a kitten!”_

_“Judson Ryder, you fell out of that tree and broke your arm.”_

_“So it wasn’t my smart move…”_

Shaken out of his thoughts by a bump in the road, he turned to see Michelle giving TK more oxygen and he pulled out his cell phone and dialed a familiar number.

“Owen? It’s TK.”


	2. Chapter 2

When Owen saw Judd’s name come across his phone, he went on high alert. He knew TK had left early for the fire station for his shift, but Judd rarely called him out of the blue like this. He slid his phone open and put the phone to his ear before speaking.

“Judd?” He heard someone let out a breath on the other side of the line and he tensed with worry.

“Owen,” Judd’s voice came through the phone and he sounded out of breath, “It’s TK.”

“Tell me my son is okay Judd,” Owen asked, grabbing the last of his things before leaving the house and going towards his car.

“He took pills Cap,” he replied, watching as Michelle continually gave the younger man oxygen. “I don’t know where he got them from. He took them in the locker room after I walked out. We’re in the ambulance on the way to the hospital. Michelle got him back, but he’s not out of the woods yet.”

Judd looked at TK and felt a fire in his chest. Why did this kid have to warm his way into his heart? TK was cocky and bullheaded, but he also wore his heart on his sleeve and seeing him struggle with his addiction was painful for the entire house. 

“Judd, are you there?” Owen’s voice came from his cell and he was immediately taken out of his thoughts and back to his conversation.

“Sorry, yeah I’m still here. We are almost at the hospital. I’ll meet you in the waiting area,” he replied, looking between Michelle and TK, “He’s gonna be okay Cap.”

He let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding, before he spoke again.

“He has to be.”

\--

_One Month Later_

“So TK,” Dr. Anne Wells started the discussion, looking at her patient. “How are you feeling today?”

“Fine,” the young firefighter responded, looking anywhere but at the psychiatrist. She took notice that he was holding a pillow to his chest, as if he needed protection and she sighed.

“You’ve been doing so much better since your first day here,” she reminded him, taking his mind back to when his dad and Judd helped him settle in at the inpatient center. He knew he needed to get better. His suicide attempt was a wake up call.

He wanted to go back to his dad. The firehouse. He wanted to feel the adrenaline of running into a building to save someone, but just the thought of that made him feel like an elephant was sitting on his chest. He was brought back to the first day he came here, feeling like he was going to fall apart and never get better.

_“Just breathe, TK. You’re going to get the help you need to kick this addiction in the ass and then you’ll be back with me,” his father said, pulling him into his arms. TK gripped his dad, not wanting to let go. His dad had always protected him. From when he almost broke his arm after falling out of a tree when he was 5 and catching him, from when his mother didn’t accept him and his father accepted him with open arms, and from when he first got addicted to drugs and his dad got him the help he needed before suggesting he apply at the fire academy after he got himself better. And now, when old wounds were opened from his mom’s texts and he thought his only option was out, his dad was there._

_But he also now had a whole team behind him._

_“You’ll be back with us kid,” Judd had stated gruffly, before pulling TK into his arms._

_“Are we hugging right now?”_

_“You tell anyone…”_

_“Who can I tell?” TK reminded him, gesturing to his new home for the next 3 months._

_“You get the help you need okay? I need your annoying ass back at the firehouse,” Judd’s words may have been humorous, but his tone was full of brotherly concern._

_TK could only nod at both of them, before watching as they both left his room._

_He could do this._

“TK?” A female voice brought him out of his thoughts and he looked to see Dr. Wells staring at him with concern.

“Sorry, you just reminded me of why I wanted to get better,” he let himself smile, before looking back at her to finish their session.

\--

_Four Months Later_

After three months of inpatient treatment and a month of outpatient treatment, TK was back at the firehouse. 

On light duty of course.

Months ago, he would have been annoyed at the limited work he would be doing, but now he was just grateful he was here. Alive. 

His father had informed him shortly after he was in treatment that he contacted his mother. After one heated conversation with the woman, Owen informed him that his mother would never speak to either of them again. He had bought TK a new phone as well, one that his mother wouldn’t be able to find the number of. Whatever his dad said to his mom, he was grateful. She was in the past. She couldn’t hurt him.

He had his dad, he had his firehouse and he had Carlos.

Or at least, he hoped so.

Carlos had visited him once in the treatment center, just to see how he was doing with his own eyes. He told TK that he didn’t want to be one of the reasons he didn’t get better. He didn’t want to hold him back.

_“I just wanted to feel something.”_

The words echoed back at him from his memory, explaining to Carlos how he took to fighting in a bar so he could feel pain. Back then, it was a relief to feel the punches come at him. 

Now, he didn’t want to even step foot inside another bar. Carlos told him that he didn't want TK to just use sex as another outlet for the pain he was feeling. He wouldn't deter TK from getting better, no matter how he was feeling about the younger man.

He had texted Carlos when he came in for his shift and was waiting for his response, impatiently of course. Judd chuckled at him when he noticed he looked at his phone a dozen times in a span of 10 minutes.

“TK, maybe he has work,” he suggested lightly, smirking as TK glared at him and sighed. 

He got up from his chair and went to his dad’s office, searching for the gum he knew his dad always hid in his top drawer before pulling out a small bottle with pills in it instead.

His hands shook as he took in the pill bottle. He wasn’t even tempted to take the pills at this point. He just wanted to know why his dad had them in the first place. Suddenly he heard footsteps come closer to the office, but he was frozen in place.

“Hey, TK there you -” Owen stopped greeting his son, as he saw the picture before him.

His son with his pill bottle.

Before Owen could fear the worst, TK looked at him with tears in his eyes, “Why do you have these pills dad?”

The room was quiet and it was like all the air got sucked out of it as father and son stared at each other.

“They’re for my nausea,” he started to explain. His son just looked at him in confusion.

“Dad, what’s wrong?” His tone worried as he dropped the bottle on his desk and walked towards the older man.

“It’s for the nausea I get after chemo.” 

TK looked stricken, his eyes going wide. “Wait, what? You have cancer?”

“It’s lung cancer, TK. It’s in the early stages. They caught it early.”

TK could only scoff, “It’s cancer dad.”

“I know,” Owen could only respond, staring at his son.

“You must think I’m so weak,” TK whispered, looking down at the floor. The pattern on the floor would be a nice distraction right now from this news.

“No. You are not weak Tyler Kennedy. You are one of the strongest people I know,” he stated firmly, putting his hand on his son’s shoulder. “I didn’t tell you because I was the weak one. I’m your dad. I’m supposed to always be there for you. I didn’t want to see the grief in your eyes the day I would finally get the courage to tell you.”

TK wiped at his eyes, before letting out a breath, “Dad, you’re still my hero,” he let himself smile before continuing, “You’re going to kick the crap out of this cancer, especially from now on because I’ve got your back.”

“I’ve got your back Dad,” he repeated, before wrapping his arms around the older man.

“Thanks son,” Owen responded, letting himself for once be comforted by TK. 

As they broke out of the hug, Owen looked at his son and smirked.

“So, I heard your waiting to hear back from Carlos.”

TK looked affronted at the statement, before glaring at his dad.

“Michelle may have told me that he gets off this afternoon,” Owen stated, smiling as his son perked up at the fact, before frowning.

“Wait, why would she tell you that?” He questioned, before Owen let out a chuckle.

“She was going to meet him for lunch after his shift ended, but she wouldn’t mind if you took her place instead. I’m sure Carlos wouldn’t mind either.”

With that, Owen walked away to the locker room whistling.

“Wait, dad...where was she meeting him?” He asked, but his father was already too far away and he grumbled to himself.

“Guess I’ll just have to ask Michelle. This won’t be embarrassing or anything,” he mumbled.

\--

“TK?” Carlos asked, surprised to see the younger man and not Michelle at their usual lunch table near the food trucks.

“Hi,” the young firefighter replied, standing up. Before he could react, Carlos grabbed him into a bone crushing hug.

“How are you? Are you okay?” The taller man asked him, before they pulled out of the hug.

“I’m better,” a small smile spread across his face as Carlos could only stare at him awe.

From how he was months ago to now, Carlos definitely saw a change in TK. There was a certain glow about him. He seemed happier and he was grateful that TK got the help he needed.

Before he could say a word, the firefighter looked up at him.

“So how about that date?”

“You sure?” He asked, biting his lip wanting to make sure that TK himself was ready. 

“Yes, I’m sure” TK grinned, “you’re buying.”


End file.
